Not Ready for Three AM

News For the Week Ended September 12, 2012
BY ANN ROSTOW


Not Ready for Three AM

It’s hard to focus on GLBT news when our main topic is eclipsed by international and political events. This week, there’s actually an interesting macro-gay story about the changing attitude towards civil rights in professional sports. But we’ll get to that later.

First, I was happy to hear Hilary Clinton denounce the anti-Muslim video. I haven’t seen it, but it sounds like a crude and vicious attack on an entire religion. So, while it may well be protected speech under the First Amendment, that does not mean that America must or should rise to its defense. Quite the contrary.

So here’s my point: Mitt Romney’s condemnation of Obama boils down to the idea that signaling our disapproval of anti-Muslim screeds is tantamount to “apologizing for America,” and/or disrespecting the First Amendment.

Why has this simple observation been lost in the noise? It’s not just that Romney “jumped the gun” or “injected politics into a tragedy.” The problem here is that the man misinterpreted the Constitution and stood up for a bigoted fringe group that rejects basic American principles of religious freedom. The Cairo press release was not apologizing for America. It was defending America.

The First Amendment protects your right to say something or make a video; it does not protect you from criticism. Our community is particularly sensitive to this duality as we watch our opponents pitch and twitch and itch for the First Amendment every time we take issue with their antigay blatherings. But we’re not trampling on their right to free speech. We’re objecting to their ideas. The Cairo embassy and the State Department have every right to object to religious bigotry that runs counter both to American policy and to American ideals.

Someone should just ask Romney if he’s seen the video and if so, does he support its position? If he says no to the first question, he’s not doing his homework as a presidential candidate. If he says no to the second question, then he can explain exactly why our country should not be allowed to issue a public rejection without being accused of pandering to terrorists.

As for the murder and chaos that now infuses the Arab autumn, what would The Mitten do, or what would he have done six months ago? Would he have used American influence to beat back popular democratic uprisings in order to preserve a despotic, albeit stable, status quo? If so, then tell us and let the voters evaluate the contrast between competing policies. If not, then what kind of alternative “leadership” would he have provided?

Finally, I am tired of Romney’s platitudes. He just told us he had a three-point foreign policy platform. And then he rattled off three meaningless phrases that I can’t recall off the top of my head. “Conviction in our principles,” “confidence in our convictions” and so forth. It’s like his generic economic “policies:” “balance the budget,” “create jobs,” “become energy independent.” The man’s a robotic mess of a candidate.
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Are You Ready For Some Football?

I’ve been skipping over my email headlines about various football players standing up for marriage equality even as I internalize a quick jolt of pleasure at the idea. The world of professional team sports has long been a bastion of antigay sentiment, ranging from macho slurs to the general feeling that an openly gay athlete would be run out of the locker room on a rail.

Could that be changing? Maybe.

Recently, Baltimore Ravens’ backup linebacker Brendan Ayanbadejo came out in favor of marriage equality, a big issue in a state where voters will soon decide whether to repeal the state’s gay marriage law or whether to let marriage equality go into effect.

Astonishingly, one of Maryland’s elected delegates, the state’s version of an assembly member, sent a letter to the Ravens demanding that Ayanbadejo stop speaking out on the subject as if the man was somehow under his jurisdiction or breaking some law. Say what?

Happily, the Ravens refused and the ensuing hoopla amplified the player’s message as well as the politician’s constitutional cluelessness. Then, Minnesota Vikings punter Chris Kluwe stepped in with an open letter to Delegate Emmett Burns:

“You know what having these rights will make gays?” he asked. “Full fledged American citizens just like everyone else.” Note that Minnesota voters will also be taking a stand on marriage when they decide whether or not to amend their constitution with antigay language.

Burns was eventually forced to retreat from his ill-considered request and admit that Ayanbadejo had every right to state his opinion. Meanwhile, over in North Dakota this week, a college athlete at North Dakota State College of Sciences was kicked off the football team for kissing his boyfriend. Ayanbadejo tweeted his support for the kid, which kept the underlying story alive for a few more days.

North Dakota State College of Sciences? Let’s just say that I don’t see their team on my University of Texas Longhorn’s schedule this year. As for the gay player, who is 18 years old, he reportedly kissed his 65-year-old “boyfriend” in the stands and subsequently lied about it. According to the school, he lost his place on the team for the lie, not for the kiss.

Look, I know you gay guys have your own relationship “dos and don’ts,” mostly do’s as far as I can tell. And I recognize as well that the stereotype of the heterosexual May December trophy wife romance is alive and well. But still!

At first I was wondering why the coach would question the player about a same-sex kiss in the first place. When I read the details I had second thoughts. Perhaps Coach was less concerned about gayness and more concerned about the half-century age gap that flirts with statutory rape laws. At any rate, this incident seems more complicated than the superficial headline that blared: “athlete kicked off team for gay kiss.”

Moving back to Ayanbadejo, he is an example of a straight man who has spent a lot of time with gay men and women. According to USA Today, his stepfather was in charge of the gay dorm at UC Santa Cruz for several years. There, Ayanbadejo got to know the students, and became a part of the dorm family. Here’s yet another example of the truism that knowing a gay person vastly increases one’s sympathy for gay civil rights. (As does living in Santa Cruz.)

That’s not a good omen for the far right, by the way. Long gone are the days when gay men and lesbians watched their vilification from the shadows. Gone are the days when Justice Lewis Powell could tell his closeted clerk that he’d never met a gay person and then turn around and cast the deciding vote to criminalize gay sex in Bowers v Hardwick. (Powell later said that he regretted that vote.)

According to Ayanbadejo, the atmosphere in the locker rooms has been changing along with the times. Other players are starting to agree with his gay rights sentiments, or at least respectfully agree to disagree. He hears fewer slurs.

I don’t know about you, but I’m rooting for the Ravens and the Vikings from now on. Unless they’re playing the 49ers or the Texans. Or the Redskins. And I kind of like the Saints.
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What’s In A Name?

I just read that Levi Johnston, he of Bristol Palin fame, has become a father again. He and his girlfriend had a daughter who they named “Breeze Beretta.” Yes, the little girl was named after a gun manufacturer. I don’t know ladies and gentlemen. Call me elitist, but the whole Palin entourage makes the Beverly Hillbillies look like the Granthams of Downton Abbey. If you consider how close they came to representing our country, it makes you breathless for a moment.

Moving on, the latest polls out of Washington are looking good. We now have a 56-38 lead on marriage rights. I know that polls have often betrayed us in the past, but this is encouraging you must admit. Minnesota polls are about tied, which is ominous.

We seem to be ahead in Maine, with marriage approval in the mid to high fifties. And Maryland seems to be close but winnable.

Let’s just say, without being complacent, I will be shocked if we don’t win at least one of these four referendums. I expect to win at least two. I’ll be delighted to win three. And ecstatic to win Minnesota as well. You know, I’m sure, that we are fighting to win marriage rights in Washington, Maryland and Maine. We are fighting against an antigay marriage measure in Minnesota.
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Family Values

Do you remember the aftermath of the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court’s legalization of same-sex marriage? It was messy. First, the legislature tried to pass civil unions, obliging the high court to issue another decision emphasizing that marriage means marriage, not civil unions.

Governor Romney, meanwhile, tried everything to undermine the decision, in particular trying to mastermind a constitutional amendment to block the ruling.

During the gap between the ruling and the start of marriage equality in early 2004, gay couples tried to meet with the governor, who brushed them off. Now, an article in the next issue of Boston Spirit describes Romney as even more obnoxious and supercilious than we thought at the time.

According to a piece about the article on Boston.com, gay activists finally got to see Romney by demonstrating outside his office. Once inside, the governor sat mostly silently during a 20-minute appeal for equality. At onc point (and here’s what struck me about the whole story) Governor Romney remarked: “I didn’t know you had families.”

As the group left his office, lead plaintiff Julie Goodridge asked the governor what he thought she should tell her 8-year-old daughter “about why her mommy and her ma can’t get married because you, the governor of her state, are going to block our marriage.”

According to Goodridge, Romney replied: “I really don’t care what you tell your adopted daughter. Why don’t you just tell her the same thing you’ve been telling her for the last eight years?” After she left, Goodridge broke down in tears at the callousness of the man.

We all knew Romney was opposed to same-sex marriage and governed as a conservative. Still, I assumed that his antigay attitudes were a feature, not of his personal views, but of his political ambitions. After all, he campaigned as a gay rights supporter in his earlier senate race. And he even solicited votes by making fliers available at a gay pride celebration.

So I just thought that deep down he really didn’t care one way or another. For him to say: “I didn’t know you had families,” is pretty incredible, particularly after the benchmark marriage litigation that went down right under his nose. Either he meant it, which suggests an extraordinary lack of awareness. Or he decided to deliberately insult the people in his office, which suggests an extraordinary streak of cruelty.

Finally, you’ll forgive me for skipping a couple of murders involving gay participants. Just because a gay person gets involved in a crime story doesn’t make the event a “gay news” story. But it’s usually interesting nonetheless. We love crime in our household!

These were sort of boring though. And one of the murders took place in India, which is very far away. So. No crime this week. Next time.
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arostow@aol.com