Cheetah: RIP

GLBT Week in Review for December 28, 2011

BY ANN ROSTOW

Cheetah: RIP

Welcome to the dead zone of GLBTLMNOP news reporting, the week between Christmas and New Year’s Day when there’s very little to write about and even less enthusiasm on the part of your valiant columnist. For example, the first three items on my “news” list concern a possible gay affair between Richard Nixon and one of his cronies, Robin Williams’ gay pug, and the death of Cheetah the chimp at age 80.

I had no idea Cheetah was still alive. Nor was I aware that chimps can live that long. This double revelation led me to select this item for coverage even though it has no gay angle. But how can we be sure? Maybe Cheetah was gay, bi, or questioning. Maybe even trans. I say this because it seems as if there was a great deal about Cheetah that I didn’t know. I never thought about Cheetah at all really, which lends even more pathos to his (or her?) death.

Robin Williams has a gay pug named Leonard who has a boyfriend, breed unknown. San Francisco readers will be intrigued to learn that Leonard lives in Tiberon. Take a drive across the Golden Gate and maybe you can catch a glimpse of the snub nosed celebrity pet. Why not? It could be fun!

 As for Nixon, a new book suggests that the swarthy psycho-prez had a thing goin’ on with none other than mobster banker Bebe Rebozo. According to “Nixon’s Darkest Secrets; The inside story of America’s most troubled president,” Dick had a platonic relationship with wife Pat and was even given kissing lessons by aides in order to convincingly display spousal affection in public. Meanwhile, author Don Folsum says a Time magazine reporter picked up a fork at a Washington dinner and caught Nixon and Rebozo holding hands under the table. Suspicions were also aroused by the two men’s numerous Florida vacations, Rebozo’s White House bedroom, as well as another incident when Nixon put his arm around Bebe in a manner that one journalist called “fishy.”

So there you have it. And I must say a less attractive pair of lovebirds can hardly be conceived. Folsum also reports that Nixon was an alcoholic and a wife beater. The book won’t be released until late January, but personally I feel as if I’ve already discovered all I want to know about the man.

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Mitten State Mania

In truth, I do have some actual news to relate. I suppose the major development last week was the passage on Thursday of an antigay bill in Michigan, which prohibits cities and schools from offering domestic partner benefits. The legislature and the governor were hoping to ban perks for state university faculty and workers as well, but it turned out that they could not override the authority of state university administrators, so that part of the law had to go. Also exempt from the ban are state government workers, for reasons I didn’t have the energy or the inclination to research.

I guess what strikes me most about this measure is its senselessness. It doesn’t save money. It brands Michigan as one of the least hospitable states in the country. It signals warnings to any employer looking to expand or relocate. It does not really win anyone political points. It’s just gratuitous gay bashing. I can understand why conservative lawmakers would want to outlaw marriage or restrict abortion. These are iconic issues that hit the hottest buttons on their consoles and satisfy their base voters. But preventing a school district from offering partner benefits? Why?

Aside from everything else, they’re asking for a lawsuit, and they’ll get one from the state branch of the American Civil Liberties Union, if not from the national legal groups.

In other state legislative news, we expect that New Hampshire lawmakers will vote to repeal the marriage equality law that was passed under friendlier folk a year or so ago. This year, Republicans in control have pledged to undo the progress of yesteryear and will likely win approval for their dastardly plan in the middle of next month.

Fortunately, Governor John Lynch has promised to veto any attempt to roll back equality, and it does not seem as if the state senate has the votes to overturn a veto. Still, it’s worrisome, and we’ll all breathe easier once the veto has withstood a final vote.

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Our Bad!

Here’s some grist for our mill. You recall that voters in Minnesota will weigh in on an anti-marriage amendment next November. We have the GOP-run state legislature to thank for that development, and of course the leader of the state senate deserves particular credit. She is none other than Senate Majority Leader Amy Koch, who just had to resign after admitting that she cheated on her husband with a married colleague.

Gay activists in Minnesota felt badly for Koch, realizing that perhaps their selfish efforts to win marriage equality for themselves did indeed have a deleterious effect on straight couples. Who knew?

Activist John Medeiros sent Koch a letter of apology on behalf of all gays and lesbians living in the state.

“We are ashamed of ourselves for causing you to have what the media refers to as ‘an illicit affair’ with your staffer, and we also extend our deepest apologies to him and his wife.” wrote Medeiros. “These recent events have made it quite clear that gay our gay and lesbian tactics have gone too far, affecting even the most respectful of our society.”

While we’re on the subject of antigay votes, don’t forget that a bunch of lawmaking fools in North Carolina have scheduled a marriage amendment for the primary ballot on May 8, so we have that to look forward to.

On the other hand, the good guys in Maine are working on a pro-marriage referendum that would re-legalize marriage equality in the Lobster State. Maine lawmakers legalized gay unions in 2009, only to see the bill shelved pending a repeal election that November. We narrowly lost that vote, ergo the only way to recapture marriage rights Down East is through another election. So far, activists have gathered more than enough signatures to put the question of marriage rights on the November ballot.

I think we have some other pro-marriage legislative efforts ahead in Maryland. maybe in Washington, and maybe in some other places. All in all, when you take into account our marriage lawsuits, our DOMA challenges, the various elections, and the battles ahead in several state capitals, 2012 should be quite a year indeed. Bring it on, as George W Bush would say.

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Lawrence of Houston

I’m down to an interesting state appellate court ruling on lesbian parental rights in Florida, as well as the news that John Lawrence, of Lawrence v Texas, died of a heart problem at the age of 68 on November 20. According to the New York Times, his death received no publicity until his lawyer tried to invite him to an event commemorating the 2003 Supreme Court ruling in his favor.

Lawrence was arrested in 1998 along with his friend, Tyron Garner, who died in 2006. After a jealous ex-boyfriend called 911 to (falsely) report a gunshot in Lawrence’s Houston apartment, police barged in and accused the two men of violating the Texas ban on same-sex sodomy. They spent a night in jail, pled no contest in order to preserve the case for appeal, and the rest, literally, is history. After several years of litigation, the case reached the High Court, where a 6-3 ruling eliminated anti-sodomy laws and reversed Bowers v Hardwick.

Lawrence and Garner were not ideal plaintiffs for a high profile civil rights case. Indeed, they were not even partners at the time. Nor were they particularly articulate or interested in law. In the Times article, Lawrence’s Houston-based lawyer Mitchell Katine said Lawrence may not have appreciated the constitutional issues. “He was upset about how he was treated, physically and personally, that night. The fire stayed in him. When he was vindicated in the Supreme Court, he felt he got justice.”

Next March, you can buy my handsome friend Dale Carpenter’s new book, “Flagrant Conduct: The Story of Lawrence v Texas,” which will be released by W.W. Norton. Dale teaches law at the University of Minnesota, poor devil.

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Say it Ain’t So, Rudy!

If you must know, I’m trying to avoid the Florida case. I don’t know why, but I’m just not in the mood. There was also a story out of Tennessee, where a woman was told that she could not visit her partner at the Rolling Hills Hospital in Franklin, because only “family members” were allowed in.

One of Obama’s small efforts to improve our lot without Congressional help was a directive that ordered any hospital that accepts federal reimbursements to treat gay and lesbian partners as family members. When the Tennessee Equality Project heard about Val Burke’s dilemma, they called the facility with a little refresher course on current law. The mandarins at Rolling Hills quickly made an about face and said Val could visit her significant other to her heart’s content.

So, Florida. Here’s the scoop derived from New York law professor Art Leonard’s blog, which I glanced at a couple of days ago and will now extract from my memory banks. The case revolves around the prototypical fighting lesbians, two women who swore lifelong allegiance, had a child, broke up, and now hate each other so much that they have made their way to Florida’s fifth district court of appeals and will no doubt extend their litigation to a higher court.

Let’s call them bio-mom and birth-mom, since bio-mom donated her egg to birth-mom, who carried their daughter to term. Barring a medical miracle, we assume that a sperm donor lurks in the background, but fortunately for our story, he is not in the picture.

After the women broke up, birth-mom grabbed the kid and went off to Australia, while bio-mom grabbed her lawyers and hit the court. A lower court ruled that bio-mom was subject to state laws governing egg donors, even though egg donors usually have no intention of raising their offspring. Although bio-mom signed a standard form that relinquishes parental rights, she did so only to comply with ironclad procedures, and everyone knew that, in fact, she was planning on being the mother of her child. The judge also noted that gays and lesbians were not eligible to become adoptive parents at the time that the baby was born, but seemed unhappy to be placed in a situation where the law dictated a result that he personally thought unfair.

Fast forward to the appellate court, where a 2-1 panel reversed the lower court, ruling that bio-mom was indeed a legal parent, and that the egg donor regulations could not trump reality under the circumstances. The panel added that adoption law was irrelevant to the case, and asked the state supreme court to clarify the law with respect to egg donors.

Oh, and Rudy Gay is back in action on the hardwoods after recovering from the shoulder injury that sidelined the Memphis Grizzly for the back half of last season. Gay led his team with 19 points on his first day, not enough to avoid a 95-82 loss to the San Antonio Spurs. Still, it’s nice to have him back, n’est-ce pas sports fans? You go, Rudy!

Speaking of Rudy, did you read that the guy who inspired the movie “Rudy” was nailed for some illegal investment scheme the other day? I watched “Rudy” one idle afternoon a year or so ago, so I remember the story of a plucky Notre Dame football fan who went to heroic lengths to win a spot on the team, even though he barely qualified for academic admittance and weighed about 100 pounds soaking wet. Now. it turns out that Rudy and his unsavory business partners raised millions for a sports drink company, but pocketed all but a fraction of the cash. Rudy recently paid a large fine to the SEC, but he may also face criminal charges.

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Ann’s column appears every week at sfbaytimes.com. She can be reached at arostow@aol.com